A Guide to Parenting by Malak Louqa is a revisit to the timeless principles of parenting we were brought up on and applied when we became parents ourselves. It deals, from a Christian perspective, with all imaginable issues of parenting with each phase of a child’s life. The book makes an easy reference since it is written in chronological order, taking the child through all ages till he or she matures and marries and thus starts an altogether new phase—that of the family as in husband and wife.
Growing up
Louqa repeatedly stresses the importance of communication between parents and children, and in this he refers to Jesus’s way of talking to his disciples and explaining matters to them. He focuses on the important concept of being diplomatic and gracious in all one’s dealings, whether with other members of the family, neighbours, friends or extended family members in matters of etiquette, accepting and returning invitations, giving and receiving gifts and conveying congratulations and condolences. To the middle aged reader, these are all concepts and issues that go without saying, but for the younger reader these common courtesies come in quite handy.
The book focuses on changes in children as they reach the age of puberty, especially on the psychological side; how they think, and how they take remarks such as “Go to your room and study!” or “Don’t go out with that friend!” or “You are too young to understand”—remarks we ourselves went through and usually resented.
Louqa tackles the intricacies of parenting in a very real and down to earth manner; as a reader you can almost hear yourself say these very words. He very neatly divides boys’ and girls’ problems, which makes easy reference for the reader.
Sex Education
Louqa then moves to general possible suggestions and solutions for some problems, giving insightful ideas of how our children interpret what they hear and see from us.
The author broaches one of the most taboo topics in our culture, sex education. He manages to cover all the areas that children and young adults question, but he does not give many practical solutions as to how to respond to these questions. As a mother, it did not help much to be merely advised to discuss the issue of sex with the children. Louqa warns against the influence of television and Internet exposure that invade our homes with ideas, concepts and images that may go against our religion and culture but again, he offers no specific help to deal with the predicament.
Connecting to Christ
At the end of the book the author discusses connecting the child and the family to the Church and Jesus. A child, he reasons, may be told stories from the Bible while yet an infant. Babies may be taken to church regularly and, as they grow, may be taught how to behave in church and how to draw on it for comfort and guidance. Naturally, the Church would become an essential part of their lives and, one day, they would be vital, active members of the church and the community.